Don’t Believe A Word I Say with Bob Segarini

The Monday Morning Mailbag

Happy Birthday Much Music…You deserve a party.

It’s been 25 years since J.D Roberts and Christopher Ward tore through a cheap bluescreen made out of construction paper and introduced Canadian cable viewers to the vision created by John Martin, Moses Znaimer, Warren Cosford, and a bunch of other passionate men and women that saw the future of music and acted on it.

There was precedent, of course. Three years earlier, almost to the day, at 12:01 am, August 1^st, 1981, MTV launched in the US with John Lack intoning the classic line, “Ladies and Gentlemen, Rock and Roll”, followed by Video Killed the Radio Star by The Buggles.

By the time Much launched, there were clip shows everywhere in the world. Samantha Taylor and I even hosted one here in Toronto called Metro Music, the brainchild of Vince Alexander, who was also part of the All Night Show with Chuck the Security Guard that ran on the same, local station, Channel 47.

Yes, there were a lot of clip shows spawned by MTV, but Much was the first national network to come along. What MTV was to the US, Much was about to become to Canada. I know…I was there.

Some background…

Months before Much went on the air, I was doing afternoon drive on Q107 as The Iceman, and co-hosting The Six O’ Clock Rock Report with Bob Mackowyz. We were at the top of our game on one of the hottest radio stations in Toronto, and I was having the time of my life. Oddly enough, it was a series of phone calls over a period of about three years that eventually led to my involvement with Much, and later, City-TV.

It started in early 1979 when CHUM’s Warren Cosford called me about doing a New Music simulcast with The Segarini Band. I’ll let Warren tell that story…

Warren Cosford…

“I was the co-executive producer, with Moses, of a series of Radio/TV Simulcasts of Concert Broadcasts.  As we were meeting about producing a show with Bob Segarini, Bob brought in a Music Video he had just produced of a song from his New Album.
He said he had been inspired by Mike Nesmith, the ex-Monkey, who was experimenting with something called Elephant Parts.

“Don’t Believe a Word I Say” was the first Music Video broadcast on City-TV and the first any of us at CHUM and City had ever seen.  But it rapidly inspired TorontoRocks….30 minutes each weekday after school with the Wicked Smile and Sly Wit of John Majhor.

Bare feet and all.”

Here’s a live clip from that Simulcast, taped live at The Palais Royale in August of 1979, and broadcast in October of that year. The music video of the song that Warren mentions, (and the name of this column/blog), was originally shown at the end of this show, but years ago, someone at City-TV transferred the simulcast from a big SONY reel to Beta, mislabeled the simulcast as being shot at the El Mocambo instead of at the Palais, and neglected to copy the video at the end of the reel. It must have been hard to get good help, even then.

Copies of that video are out there somewhere, and I’m still looking for one, the master of which was left in a cab years ago by its director, Rodney Bowes. I forgave him years ago…I’ve done worse.

…and the show Warren credits my video for being the inspiration for, (God, my grammar sucks)…

The next call was also from Warren. It was in 1981 after I had stopped playing regularly and was sitting around my dining room table with Cam Carpenter drinking beer one morning trying to figure out what the hell I was going to do with myself now that I was once again, bandless…and yes, I said morning, which to Cameron and I was very late last night.

The phone rang. Someone asked me if I’d like to be a disk jockey. I hung up on him. I thought it was a joke. He called back. It was Warren…and once again, here he is to tell the story…

Warren Cosford…

“It was 1981.  The Morning Shows on both CHUM and CHUM-FM sucked.  Q-107 was The Hot Rocker in town.  CFNY was The Hip Rocker.   The CHUMs were living on Heritage.   We needed to shake things up.

My Boss….J. Robert Wood….asked me to conduct “the most extensive Talent Search in The History of Radio”.

You think I’m joking?

We put a kid from The CHUM Newsroom into a CHUM news cruiser sent him off to tape every Pop Music Station in North America from Boston in the East, to Minneapolis in the West and Nashville in the South.  He was gone for three months.  And came back with many miles of aircheck tapes.

While he was doing that, I got on the phone and called Everywhere Else.  A Simple Ploy.  I asked the PD of Radio Station A who they would like to get out of town.  Then I called Radio Station B and asked the same question.  Both sent me airchecks.

But might there be Someone Local?  I already had some success recruiting Kelly Jay of Crowbar fame for all nights and Jim McKenny of  Maple Leafs Hockey fame for sports.  Who else?

And then I thought of Segarini.

Bob Segarini was an American from California who had adopted Canada.  (Although I always suspected he was “wanted” back in Stockton).  Over the years he had been in bands that always had a “buzz” but rarely any hits.  As a solo act, we had produced a CHUM-FM/City-TV Simulcast with him which was one of my favourites because it contained the First Music Video any of us at CHUM/City had seen.

“Don’t Believe a Word I Say” was a single from his “Gotta Have Pop” album.  It is an hilarious song about picking up girls in a bar.   In the Video Bob is standing at a bar singing pickup lines to an attractive woman.  And then he turns to The Camera and says what he’s really thinking.

I thought…..Toronto Radio needs someone with that kind of creativity.  So Bob and I had a drink.  In fact we had many drinks.  I seem to recall it became a Scotch Tasting Party.

At The End of The Night we had The Plan.

Using the name The Iceman, Bob would send audition tapes to CHUM-FM hoping to become an announcer.  Of course we would send letters of rejection.  I would tell people at the station about “this crazy kid from Scarboro” who won’t take “no” for an answer.   Bob would then call The Control Room and pester the evening announcer….Larry Wilson.   In fact “pester” enough so that Wilson would remember him.

Then one weeknight at midnight following a suitable amount of static interference, Larry Wilson’s Show on CHUM-FM would be “interrupted” by a voice claiming to be “broadcasting” from Scarboro and technically able to intercept CHUM-FM’s signal from studio to transmitter and replace it with his own.

The Iceman Cometh.

“Ice” would then explain that this was his way of “auditioning” for a job at CHUM-FM despite having been rejected many times because he had “no experience”.   Unfortunately he was only capable of “intercepting” CHUM-FM’s signal for an hour at a time, but he planned to continue to “audition” each night at midnight until he had “the experience” he needed to be hired.

The next morning, CHUM-FM Chief Engineer Bruce Carnegie would be interviewed on The Morning Show explaining that what had happened was “technically impossible” and “without precedence” and that he would be personally standing by at the CHUM-FM transmitter to make sure that The Iceman would not be successful again.

Of course “Ice” would continue to Cometh.

After that, The Plan was to play things by ear and take our cues from The Audience.  We had lots of ideas.  For example, Ice could take requests by calling various phone booths throughout Toronto which he would identify beforehand on the air.

The key to The Stunt was that only Allen Waters, J. Robert Wood, Bruce Carnegie, Segarini and I would know what was REALLY going on.  Everything would be pre-taped outside the station earlier in the day and played back from a tape machine at the CHUM-FM transmitter.

Would The Audience have bought it?  I think so.  A few years earlier I produced a Jay Nelson character on the 1050 CHUM Morning show named Shredney Vashtar jumping over The Niagara Gorge on a 10 Speed Bicycle on a Sunday Morning.  Much to our surprise, a few hundred people showed up in Niagara.

The Iceman Stunt was far more believable.

Alas, management wouldn’t go for it.  But we did hire Bob Segarini as The Iceman.”

I still cannot thank Warren enough for getting me into broadcasting, but I’ll keep trying. Thanks, Warren.

The next phone call came in 1982, and was from Gary Slaight. In a nutshell, I was fired from CHUM, ( a 10 minute interview with Motorhead that turned into a 3 hour gabfest about music and playing records nowhere near the playlist will do that to you), but less than 24 hours later was on the air at Q107, thanks to Gary and Bob Mackowycz. Less than 6 months later I was bumped up from the midnight shift to afternoon drive, the luckiest son of a bitch on the planet.

Thanks, Gary.

Then the call came that took me to the wild and wacky world of television.

It was from John Martin.

John was the the man that brought class and in-depth information to the fans of rock and roll and the emerging niche music genres with an amazing tv show called The New Music. Moses Znaimer recognized the brilliance of John’s idea and brought him into the City-TV family to make his vision a reality after the CBC, Global, and CTV networks all turned it down.

It was a sensation, and everyone watched it wherever it was shown. I had met John socially many times over the years, and worked with him on a couple of the simulcasts that Warren had fostered, doing things like the voice over intros for the likes of Motorhead, and similar assignments, but mostly, John and I liked to sit and drink, and shoot the shit, two guys who loved music, and a cold pint.

He called me and asked me to meet him up on the rooftop patio at Richard and Patti’s Bamboo in the heart of the hippest part of Queen Street after my shift was over. Absolutely. I figured I was in for some good Thai food, (not yet available everywhere like it is today), and drinks ranging from cold beer to more exotic drinks that relied on 14 different varieties of rum and a bit of fruit.

We met. We drank. We ate. Then he dropped a bombshell.

“We’re launching a music television network and I’d like you to be a part of it” he said, Player cigarette in one hand and a pint of Labatt Blue in the other.

Wow. Me? On television? A VJ? I thought for a minute, surprised that I was being asked.

“Wow. A VJ, I’m flattered, John”.

He looked at me across the remains of a good meal and an assortment of glasses, orange peels, and those stupid little umbrellas.

“No”, he said, “Not as a VJ. As a producer”.

A producer? Of television? Me?

“What does a television producer do?” I asked.

He smiled his crooked little British smile, drooping eyelids barely covering up his standard twinkle and said, “You’ll find out”.

I’m not sure I ever did.

Continued as part of Wednesday’s Rock Files…

And now, the Mailbag:

About The Family Tree…

Kenny Blue Ray

Thanks, Bob…enjoy the communication

Toni

Another interesting “read”. Good to hear thoughts and feeling about people who were there at the time. I have done a lot of moves so not in communication with people from the day, feeling a new connection. Thanks Again.

Gary Lewis Smalley

In 1987 I owned Mid Cal Auto Sales in Stockton. My old school buddy, Gary Wagner, came in and bought a 1964ish Black Lincoln Continental. We talked about his music (and he was still makin’ music!), his last 20 years and his beautiful girlfriend. He was still his wonderful self. That was 22 years ago. I don’t know if he has that old Lincoln or the girlfriend, but he still has my friendship! Sure like to see him again.
Gary Lewis Smalley

About The Segarini Band and rehearsing…

Gord Byrd

The first gig was Dawson College, the second was the Edgewater Hotel, the third was The Midwich Cukoo, the fourth was The El Mo and finally the fifth at Fryfolgels in London. Then the long drive home with David’s replacement (I remember his name but will keep it to myself because he was the Douchebag who caused the band to split). I had a great … Read Moretime playing your songs, Bob, and Keep Me Strong is still one of my all time favorites. You know the road ain’t easy…but we had a lot of fun while it lasted. At last, the truth behind the “original” Segarini Band has been revealed. But, don’t believe a word I say.
Your favorite Canadian name.

SEG SAYS: Good memory there, Gordo. That was a great band, was it not. Wish I had that live version of ‘Self Abuse’. What a cool song to play. Gotta get together soon and see what we can remember of those gigs.

Todd Miller

Yes, I do well remember your disdain for rehearsing! I think my offering to bring a case of Lone Star changed your mind for a rehearsal at “Mike The Drummer’s place! Now THAT was a small room we rehearsed in…I do believe Kashur was either standing or laying on what could be described by some as a ‘bed’, I think it resembled one of those cowboy bed rolls beside the fire; I had a rack tom up my backside and every cymbal splash/crash caused what is left of my hair into instant comb-over one way, and Mikey’s guitar histrionics the other way; and Jingles’s amp/toaster oven was doing double duty as a chair. Good days…the music was fanstatic, the beer was good, and the experience I shall never have again…Thank you!

SEG SAYS: You’re welcome. Guys like you and Lawrie are so good, guys like me HAVE to rehears just to keep up. Bastards…

Keith (Keef) Fraser

The pictures of you the other band members always brings back bad memories of my youth. You guys are always hip and cool looking. I had to buy my cloths at “Flanagan’s, proper fashions for tots to teens.” I was always shown to the portly and stout rack. Gordy Byrd may have thought you were ahead of your time, I was always thought of as 100 years behind he times. I think I’ll go clean something.

Jaimie Vernon

Bob,
Your mention of the All The Young Dudes’ “All The Old Demos” has prompted an avalanche of people asking me for a copy of the disc. Wrong label, my friend. That was Pacemaker in the ’90s. The only copy I have was the one you gave me so we could sell MP3s…how about we put ‘em up on http://www.bullseyesongs.com for next week and share ‘em with the class?

SEG SAYS: Sounds good to me…

Carla Lockhart

No wonder I missed it! I moved to Nashville that year (dragged kicking and screaming from my house in Sausalito). . .

Michele Hartley

Enjoyed reading this Bob! I could possibly kick Henman for dropping out…but then.. oh, I’ll shut up now. Love all the music..Family Tree to Cat’s and Dog’s and if something came later..I’m out of the loop and wish to be in it to hear! I won’t be totally happy till I have every song you ever wrote and recorded. : )

About Wack and Roll…

Jim Chisholm

Hey Bob I haven’t even heard all of side 2 yet and I’m beside myself with this Classic Wacker’s elpee.
Some great music is finally seeing the light of day. I used to have a compilation of Punk songs on a vinyl record with Captain Nemo on it. I reluctantly loaned it to a friend and never saw it again. Happy Happy Birthday

SEG SAYS: To everyone who have sent me birthday greetings, (and you laggers who might later on), thanks to all of you who have made this a very special day. I am so touched, I almost spilled a Bourbon and Zero. Seriously, Thank you. You are all responsible for making me feel loved and blessed.

Brian Blain

Lovin’ those old tracks you posted on A and R online. That signature chunky-chunk guitar sound of the Wackers brings me back to those heady days

About the column in general…

John Covert

Just thought I’d wish you well and say hello.    A blast from the past.   I’m still performing, mostly keys now due to an injury that occurred while opening a Tower of Power show.   Doing a show called Hippie Party! Revising the filmore days..thats a gas!  Kenny Ray turned me onto your site.    Great guy!

God bless.

SEG SAYS: Another Stockton boy surfaces. Good on ya, John. Nice to hear from you and please stay in touch…

Shirley White

Hello Mr. Segarini,
Finally decided it’s time say thank you for all the enjoyable reading you are providing me when I get up for work in the wee hours of the morning. As many have said, you write in the moment, your thoughts flow effortlessly and you tell it like it is. I’ve even laughed out loud, especially at the moment you fell flat on your face in front of Martha Reeves. Not laughing at you, mind, but it was funny and I’ve had a similar experience; upon reading yours, it took me right back to that moment in time we all want to forget.

I also wanted to ask if you ever played in Halifax at the Misty Moon on Gottingen or was it at the Moon on Kempt Rd….I seem to recall “Roxy” on the billboard. Over the years I’ve listened to Mr. Downchild at the Moon accompanied by Matt Minglewood…they rocked the joint many times!

Now that you’ve teamed up with David at FYIMusic, maybe you two can answer a question that’s been bugging me for sometime. I’ve searched and can’t find anything on Amanda Marshall…what has become of her??? I’m a huge fan and just recently some radio stations have been playing her tunes. This usually happens if a new CD is coming out. Do you know if this might be the case?
P.S. Love listening to RTDS…enjoyed last weeks list. Keep the stories coming!

SEG SAYS: Amanda is alive and well and working on a new album. As far as Halifax goes, played there with The Dudes opening for the Bee Gees back in ’75, but the Misty Moon was not on our itinerary to play. We did, however, spend some time drinking there as well as Viva Zapata’s, and enjoying the music of Dutch Mason, Matt Minglewood, and Sam Moon. Great town, Halifax…

Martin Melhuish

Hey Bob,

I still remember those commutes from Montréal we did on the “Turbo” – that big yellow VIA Rail train that used to hit trucks at crossings on a regular basis, broke down every four trips and never got the temperature control right. Those were the Crash and Burn days… yeah, not only for the train. Pretty exciting musical times in Toronto of the late ’70s.

There was one memorable night when, after spending the trip in the bar car, you had a gig at the El Mocambo and we headed straight there from the station. We were late and by the time we arrived the band was on the verge of a nervous collapse. I don’t know whether at the point you were in a state to mumble a Dylan song let alone you’re own repertoire. So you didn’t sing… well not a lot anyway. While the band and the audience watched, you launched into an impromptu set of impressions capped by a hilarious take off on Elvis Costello. It was a moment that for some reason worked for everybody. I was in stitches, but then again I’d had a few drinks.

You mentioned the Dudes album. Still one of the greatest travesties every perpetrated on an artist by a label. The well-deserved buzz on that album from people who heard the demos and saw the band live was huge. You had strong managment set up in the U.S. and a major label “behind” you. And then that label decides to bring in a producer… I won’t mention his name… ah fuck it, Mark Spector who later became .38 Special’s manager. I think someone over there at Epic thought they were getting Phil Spector. (To be fair, Mark will have his own take on this but it would not change the results.) I remember the day we listened to the finished mixes of the album and realized right then and there that it was all over folks. My copy of that album is in the Media Commons archives at the U of T with a note saying: “Under no circumstances, play this album. It could result in wrong impressions of a Montréal band that really – I wouldn’t lie to you – was on the verge of something very special in the late ’70s.”

I know when you finally made the move to Toronto, the waitresses at Thursday’s and the Wrong Number on Crescent Street really missed you. They would always ask after you. “Where is that asshole, Segarini?! He owes me money!”

SEG SAYS: Always a pleasure to hear from you, Marty. Yes…those were great trips on the Turbo. Don’t remember it being yellow, though. I DO remember the elevated bar car and the fun we had in there. We made that trip so often, it got to the point where I could walk on with the crew sometimes. Remember Shelly Siegal handing Heart to us to show around Montreal on their first tour opening for Rod Stewart, and spending the whole night with them at The Wrong Number getting plowed?

Man, could the Wilson sisters drink…

Thanks to all of you who wrote and shared your stories with us. That’s why we’re here. See you all on Wednesday…

That’s enough for now. Email me at segarini@fyimusic.ca with your comments, complaints, and thoughts…and remember…don’t believe a word I say.

Bob “The Iceman” Segarini was in the bands The Family Tree, Roxy, The Wackers, The Dudes, and The Segarini Band and nominated for a Juno for production in 1978. He also hosted “Late Great Movies” on CITY TV, was a producer of Much Music, and an on-air personality on CHUM FM, Q107, SIRIUS Sat/Rad’s Iceberg 95, (now 85), and now provides content for radiothatdoesntsuck.com with RadioZombie, The Iceage, and PsychShack. Along with the love of his life, Jade (Pie) Dunlop, (who hosts and writes “I’ve Heard That Song Before” on RTDS), continues to write, make music, and record.